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ALICE IN WONDERLAND: The Surf Journalism Expedition Dispatch #5

Back to Wonderland...


It’s been five days since I set foot on land. Five days with a solid stomach; no seasickness, no Bali Belly. Now, sitting here at the computer screen my brain feels pinned to the uppermost portion of my skull and my stomach feels like it’s lurching with a ten foot swell. The wood of the Macaroni’s surf camp warps and moves like an Indonesian Alice In Wonderland.

A small price to pay for the uncrowded Macaroni’s that we dined on for breakfast. As our surf president and resident barrel charger puts it, “Barrels for breakfast.” I woke up at 6:15 to boardshorts and boards moving swiftly past my windows. I brushed my curly hair away from my eyes as I watched the first boatload head into the lineup. I pounded a Mandarin juice from a small cardboard carton before throwing on my damp gear and hopping on the skiff. I rationalized that there was no time for food, Macca’s with six guys on it was just too tempting.

The waves were, or I suppose are, about shoulder high and fun. A projector beams the image onto the wall above my head and I watch only a few guys share the side onshore noon-time waves. When I say side onshore I mean the most fun onshore you’ve seen. A little sectiony, but makeable, rippable and still throwing barrels.


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I suppose we’ll have some class in a little while but that’s just as fun as the surf. We analyze why we’re here, why we surf and what the meaning of it all is. For a rabid fan of all things surf, it’s an intensive look into the meaning of surfing lives, and for all of us aboard the D’Bora, that’s what life is.

And I can’t wait another minute to get back to it, rocking hard wood floors and all. I suppose when I get back on the boat, I’ll be comfortable once again and even more comfortable when I get back into the lineup. Back into Wonderland.

Reader Comments 
Posted Thu Jul24, 2008, 2:20 PM — By Georgen SchutzStaffel
Good day from the ranks of the GSS (Georgen Protective Squadron), where we believe "My Honor is True." From the sound of it, things on the front line are going as planned-- Training the next generation of warriors, firmly planted in the traditions of the past while forging ahead into the future, united in the fight against the powers of ignorance. Developing minds capable of independet thought and action, the GSS will "Never Give Up/Never Surrender." ~D.Bloggenz
Posted Thu Jul24, 2008, 2:23 PM — By D. Bloggenz--Georgen SchutzStaffel
Good day from the ranks of the GSS (Georgen Protective Squadron), where we believe "My Honor is True." From the sound of it, things on the front line are going as planned-- Training the next generation of warriors, firmly planted in the traditions of the past while forging ahead into the future, united in the fight against the powers of ignorance. Developing minds capable of independet thought and action, the GSS will "Never Give Up/Never Surrender." ~D.Bloggenz
Posted Thu Jul24, 2008, 4:59 PM — By Terry
I am fairly sure no amount of perfect, empty surf could lure me into discussing, "why we're here, why we surf and what the meaning of it all is' with either of the Georges. If that boatload of "next generation warriors" (?????) makes any headway in fighting "the powers of ignorance," then "the powers of ignorance" took a knee. And please, put that guitar down. The world already has one Jack Johnson, and that's one Jack Johnson too many.
Posted Thu Jul24, 2008, 8:20 PM — By mungo
no more pics?? dont you have a qualified photographer on board? who s good and who sucks?
Posted Fri Jul25, 2008, 1:16 AM — By pj
mungo is that you? you couldn't handle more pics. and who sucks? wha?
Posted Fri Jul25, 2008, 7:09 PM — By outlook
I honestly didn't want to dignify any of these lame, negative, pessimistic,and downright rude, comments aimed at these true-hearted surfer-students, by responding on this blog. But, as they continue through each added update, I can't take it any longer. The truth is, it doesn't matter what anyone thinks of this adventure, except the people on it, who are ,no doubt, fulfilling a dream. These are not pro-surfers, or pro-writers. What they're out there for is all good. Your bad attitudes and personal vendettas must be eating you alive. Ever heard of karma? Why don't you just go play in the street, you don't belong in the waves.
Posted Fri Jul25, 2008, 8:14 PM — By 23 Chips
The Chips wonders if this generation of warriors will be trained in photo ops with young naked boys and homoerotic writing about sleeping men. The Chips looks forward to the dispatch from that day's lesson. 23 Chips
Posted Fri Jul25, 2008, 8:23 PM — By 24 Chips
Now, Outlook, 24 Chips thinks you're close. What this really is, however, is a bunch of Cal Poly Surf Team bros who suckerd their parents into paying for trip to indo by telling them it's for school. Oh, 24 Chips has one more Chip than 23 Chips, and bigger guns as well. These kids on the other hand have no Chips, because the George boys took 'em all and gave them to the naked and erotic boys and sleeping men.
Posted Sat Jul26, 2008, 1:16 AM — By Ellie Metiver
I'm one of those "Cal Poly parents", I'm so sad for Chips 23/24 - wish you were loved.
Posted Sat Jul26, 2008, 4:03 AM — By Silver Surfer
After reading the negative comments about this great trip, I have been nonplussed for some days ... a tough condition to be in when you're a math instructor (pun intended). The students on this trip are not only getting legit. college credit for the outing, but they are also doing humanitarian work along with the writing and the surfing. The inexcusably caustic folks who are lashing out at the George brothers are not only parading abject ignorance and pettiness, they are exuding that spirit which prevails to make any given courtroom a travesty of justice whenever the verdict has been secretly rendered long before the proceedings have ever begun. By George, Matt and Sam are doing a great work, and one can only sit with incredulity regarding the sad state of mind which prevails over those who wish to demean the trip. It's like one of my friends says on various occasions: "People are down on, what they're not up on."
Posted Sat Jul26, 2008, 11:39 AM — By Ò◊€12‡‡∏Ôfi
Silver Surfer, you’re a teacher??? Are you sure you’re not a STUDENT? Like, maybe, a college sophomore, hoping to wow your poli-sci prof.with freshly acquired vocab and cultured metaphors? Stick to numbers mathman. Laughably convoluted. And question to all of you: When did surfing and surfers become HIP-HOP, where any criticism/cynicism makes you a “hater?” Is what we do SO SACRED that even tiny daggers fuel so much stupefied “how DARE YOU!” in reply? Personally, I think the George Brothers peddle pseudo-spiritual nonsense and I’d sooner have Brandon Walsh – staff writer, West Beverly Blaze – teach my kids journalism 101. And while I’m at it, Laird Hamilton is a humorless douche, Tim Curran’s music sucks and Bruce Irons appears to be mildly retarded.
Posted Sat Jul26, 2008, 7:22 PM — By 23 Drips...Tug and Squeeze to Slater's Slumber
Hey Chips...Did the Kelly Slater article get you hard? Looking for some Shelter to secretly whack in? Get a life you fuckin' moron...and, by the way, I'm the Silver Surfer's boss, and he's a hell of a math teacher.
Posted Sat Jul26, 2008, 8:21 PM — By Boss?????
Tug & Squeeze...you're a PRINCIPAL? I guess dignity and restraint aren't in the job description. I'm sure your area PTA would be thrilled to know you're online calling out "fucking moron(s)," and wondering who got "hard" and what they "whack" to. I pity the district. And as best I can tell, no one said Silver Surfer can't teach, just that he's a crappy writer. As for the George-fest, I'll say only that whatever is happening on that trip - humanitarian, educational or recreational - it sure translates to some snoooooooozy copy.
Posted Sun Jul27, 2008, 9:03 PM — By Silver Surfer
CHIPS Ahoy Matey! I never wrote anything about hate ... that was your word! Your caustic attitude is puzzling, though. Case in point: your unsolicted, ignorantly assuming commentary/critique on my writing when that had absolutely nothing to do with the intended purpose in addressing you in the first place. My motives in posting were only to protest your overly critical/caustic statements and to put in a vote for some guys who are doing outstanding things with their lives. Your egregious attitude is obviously not something for anyone except you to figure out. As it appears clear nothing will change any time soon in this regard, there is no use in getting into a futile, back-and-forth discussion. If you want, I'll be glad to give you the last word. The CHIPS are down, SS P.S. Did I tone down the vocab enough for you on this round?
Posted Mon Jul28, 2008, 12:06 AM — By 23 Chips
The Chips have done some thinking. APOLOGIES TO ALL who had to read our last few days of posts. It's apparent now that it has all been quite juvenile. Not sure why but at the time it seemed cool and clever to make jokes about homosexuality, biceps and guns, and to make harsh judgements about individuals we've never even met. Looking back, it's a little embarrassing. Probably stemmed from envy. Sorry everyone. To the students: Good luck on the trip. The Chips are off to do something productive and postive now.
Posted Mon Jul28, 2008, 12:44 PM — By Emily Saunders, Seal Beach
Okay, as a 3rd party observer, allow to me to dub this Single Most Entertaining Thread of the Year. My notes are as follows: Chips’ fixation on a 15 year old Slater piece is odd – and would seem to imply some fetish for Slater himself (join the club). However, he is correct in heckling the story itself, which was a failed, awkward attempt at something edgy. Of course, we all know that “apologies” entry was crafted by a NON-Chips entity, presumably Tug & Squeeze or…Silver Surfer – I think you are trying to say “I support what these guys are doing” but after rereading your posts multiple times, all I know for sure is that the other guy was correct in saying you can’t write (and he didn’t suggest you should “tone it down” but rather simplify things a little until you get the whole “prose” thing wired). Ellie – hope your kids had fun, D.Bloggenz – best of luck defending The Georges and Outlook - if “it doesn’t matter what anyone [but those onboard] think,” then why are you posting? Thanks for the fun!!!
Posted Mon Jul28, 2008, 10:16 PM — By max
Will, it sounds like your having a sick time. Your story makes me dream of the windy waves in Oregon that I long for as I work up in Alaska. Get barreled for me man. See you in GB.

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